Soulsong #498 – How Do I Set Boundaries?
How do I set boundaries with people who don’t always respect my time, my privacy, my possessions, or my values? And how do I enforce boundaries once I’ve set them?
The best way to set boundaries is to live in such a way that no boundary-setting is needed on my part. The problem with boundaries is that when I try to keep a person or certain behaviors out of my experience, I’m actually begging for more-of-the-same from the Universe, which simply and continually responds to my thoughts. So, via Law of Attraction, I’m likely to receive more-of-the-same from the transgressor or from someone else.
Solution: Instead of focusing on what I DON’T WANT from people and trying to keep it away, I ask myself what I DO WANT from my interactions and use any transgressions as a springboard to ponder and savor those desires. I probably want to receive courtesy, consideration, sensitivity, appreciation for who I am, and respect for my schedule and my values. So, I imagine receiving those things from others. I remember all the good-feeling times I DID receive those from others. I begin noticing those things with heightened appreciation when they show up. And I enjoy being the kind of person who exhibits this courtesy and sensitivity.
As I make it a habit to think about the ways I want people to interact with me, the boorish, thoughtless ones will turn up infrequently in my experience. And if they DO turn up, they’ll treat me better than they treat other people, for I am no longer vibrating at a place/thinking thoughts that elicit unwanted actions. The Law of Attraction simply won’t allow insensitive people into my experience, or if it does, they’ll be on their very best behavior.
Ahhhh…life just got a whole lot smoother.
***
Copyright 2007, Karen Williams
